love and relationship advice

Hello, all. I'll cut to the chase. I am a 32yr old male. The last time I was in ANY kind of relationship was almost 3 years ago. She broke my heart, ripped it out of my chest. I have been so scared of the same thing, that I refuse to meet anyone. Wel, there is this girl that works at a local store, over a yr ago, I started noticing her. Whever I would kind of glance over at her, she was already looking at me, and we always lock eyes for a few seconds (sounds high schoolish I know) Well, just recently I said ta hell with it, and I told her that I thought she was STUNNINGLY beautiful, wich she is. That was it, I just told her and then I left. Like I said, I am horrified at meeting anyone, and haveing things lead up, then getting hurt again, but I really cannot stop thinking about her to be honest. We really always keep eye contact for a few seconds whenever I see her. Now here is the question. What is my next move? There is really no opening line here, I don't think. Did I F up, by telling her she was beautiful? I'm so out of it, I am rusty. Please help me out, cause I am really torn here. Do I talk to her, and what if she is a sweety, and should I let her get to know me and get my heart slaughtered by takeing a chance? Or do I just live alone ? Please, I think I need help with my NEXT step

Thanks alot for any help

Hello,

I think you did the right thing by telling her she was STUNNINGLY beautiful. What was her reaction? Did she smile? Did she blush?

Falling in love and being in love are WONDERFUL feelings. I definitely think that you should not let fear get the better of you. Life is so much richer when you have someone to share it with. You have so much life ahead of you, it would be a shame to pack it all in and just decide to live alone to avoid possible hurt.

Now, even with that said, there are no guarantees in life as I'm sure you know. I'm not saying that you will never get hurt again, you might. Life is full of disappointments and pain but it is also full of rewarding moments and great joy.

My advice is to go back to that store and talk to her. You may want to say something like "I hope I didn't embarrass you with my outburst the other day, but you really are stunningly beautiful" and she what her reaction is. If you feel like you might have a chance at asking her out, ask her if she would like to go out for a cup of coffee (or lunch or something) when she gets her break. OR a safer way to ask would be "Would you like to go out for a cup of coffee sometime."

Keep us posted, and let us know how everything goes.

Deb

Thank you so much for letting me on her to talk. I found out that she told someone that "if she did'nt have a boyfriend" THATS THE STORY OF MY LIFE. So should I just get on with everything? Or should I still TRY and persue her? Thanks again for being so nice

Well, how nice to know that she would like to go out with you if she didn’t have a boyfriend. I know it’s not the best response you could have gotten, but it's better than a flat out no/not interested.

My advice now is to go on with life, but don't give up totally on her. Don't avoid her or the store. You should still be nice to her and a little harmless flirting wouldn't hurt either because you never know ... one day she might not have a boyfriend. But don't stop "living" or put life on hold waiting for her.

Deb